Your Ironic Chef (lilithcoyote) wrote in mf_unicorns,
Your Ironic Chef

The Male Feminist Love Affair with FTMs

There's nothing a male feminist loves more than a good female-to-male transsexual, I'm tellin' ya. Yessirree Bob! Now of course, every male feminist is different and unique, like a precious snowflake, so their reasons for adoring FTMs differ substantially. Those reasons can include:

1. "Trans People Love!" Joining the tranny fan club is a great way to prove just how much you, as a white, male, heterosexual citizen of a first world nation love them minority folks! Making sure you focus lots of attention on FTMs makes you sound more knowledgeable, too, since most dudes in your position only know about MTFs, and call them "shemales" at that. You can pretend that you are using your status of privilege for good, spreading the word about trans tolerance without ever so much as examining your own sexism, racism, or homophobia.

2. "The Enemy of My Enemy Is My Protected Species!" What better way to stick it to those oppressive, stuck-up McDworkinites than to show the world that all their concern about women getting chemically and surgically altered by patriarchal medicine is just "transphobia," and that you, the truly enlightened special male feminist snowflake, truly understand the plight of the tranny and how important it is. No actual effort or thinking required, you'll get instant kudos and applause from your liberal buddies for putting those mean radfems in their place!

3. "Love To Hate You." Hating trannies, on the other hand, can also prove useful. If you're a male feminist trying to gain credibility with radical feminists, who are more likely to be skeptical of your motives and also more likely to scrutinize your character, your actions, and your words for signs of insincerity or hidden sexism or misogyny, loudly decrying the evils of Trans can quickly shift the focus off of you and onto someone else, boosting your credibility. This probably won't work forever, but it can work long enough to make you feel important and righteous.

4. "Anything Women Can Do, Men Can Do Better!" FTMs are a great lo-cal replacement for women, on your blogroll, as a guest blogger, as "feminist expert witnesses," so on and so forth. There are many, many benefits to this! Since FTMs are male-identified themselves, they are far less likely to call into question your own status as a special, magical feminist man. But, since they were raised as girls, lived as women, and experienced many landmark female life events they can also back you up in any claim you make about women and add that extra special touch of credibility! Frequently they suffer from low self-esteem, which means any crumb you throw them will be appreciated and returned fivefold with favors such as beating back pesky women who think you're a misogynist by screaming "transphobe!" at them and causing a large distraction.

A FTM is the perfect weapon to have at your side to fight off anything a woman might say that you might not want to hear. FTMs can be feminists, but they do it better because they're men--just like you. FTMs have periods, but they do it better, because they're men! FTMs have to worry about breast cancer, but they do it better, because they're men! FTMs get raped, but they do it better, because they're men! FTMs have to deal with sexism, but they do it better, because they're men! FTMs have sex with men, but they do it better, because they're men too but they're not gay males! FTMs can be lesbians, but they do that better because they're men too! Best of all, FTMs can get pregnant, give birth, and breastfeed...but they do it all better because they're men!

Gentlemen, there's simply no reason to ever listen to a woman ever again. Anything a woman can do, say, think, or experience, FTMs can do better, and back you up with their male-identified perspective. You thought that you would have to give a woman a position of status, for instance, if you wanted a section of your web publication or "blog" to be about pregnancy and childbirth? HELL NO, fellas! Just find a pregnant FTM, problem solved!


Ahem. *packs up soapbox*

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